WE ARE VICTORIOUS
A day I will never forget was the 22nd of June 2004, at Goma the North of Kivu in the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC). I was only 7 years old when two men brutally assaulted, raped and tortured me. They were armed and their faces where hidden in many scars, I had never seen them before in my life.
I was mutilated, destroyed and tortured physically as well as psychologically, I lost my innocence and the certainty that nothing horrible could happen to me. The fact of living in a city and pretending to be free from barbarism had not spared me from the nightmare of that day. I became part of the statistics which showed that one third of women are victims of sexual assault. I was so scared that I could not breathe; a painful and morbid fear beyond all I could have imagined. Words alone cannot describe this tragic episode. Since that day I had stopped being an ordinary woman, rather than being exceptional I became vulnerable.
IS THIS A SHAME?
There is no shame in being a victim, but it is ridiculous that a victim finds himself/herself before a judge and lawyers and is questioned as if you are there for execution because society has the impression that a woman who is a victim of rape is comparable to a criminal. In the end you keep an almost permanent feeling of guilt for the criminal acts committed by adults in an unparalleled violence. More than 11 years later, I do not understand much of it and the feeling is still there, powerful and disturbing. Facing all this I could simply weep and cry. In my tears, I think of other women and girls that have been raped, the cries of beaten women and much worse things. I can only imaging the silence of women who for 16 or more years are confronted with this danger of their destruction. This culture of silence and stigma is killing us especially women. I would like to shout so loudly that the whole world will hear it because my silence make me feel guilty. I thought that after 11 years I could get out of my closet.
There is a life after rape, but as long as women are raped and killed, equality is only a mockery. Let no one tell us that times are hard and that we will have to be courageous, for courage is a personal quality, which is accomplished in the moment, following a decision that one takes by oneself facing an imminent risk or danger. I invite all women and girls to courage and self-confidence. Let us not be deceived, we are not unworthy. Let us know that beyond violence there is an exceptional life that we have to wrest by our courage and resilience. We agree that we have not had the chance to be ordinary women, but today we are not only passing from vulnerable to exceptional but also we are extraordinary because in us there is the capacity and the power to change the World, a minute is enough for that. I am convinced that we are rich and full of love and that we must remove the feeling of guilt from us. We have the right to enjoy our lives as valuable beings.
Dear women, girls, gentlemen, and young people like me, this is the message I had to share with you. A message of love, hope, peace and courage. We must break the silence in front of all the injustices of which some of us continue to be victims, so that together we can build a Congo, an Africa and a world where it is nice to live.
Let the victims stop to remain so and become VICTORIOUS
Thank you